Last month, British GQ made an alarmingly astute observation: we’re in the midst of a fashion era that more than ever resembles professional sports. Blame the new spectacle on the furious trading of creative directors like they’re top tier premier league players. For fans, Virgil Abloh’s appointment to LV creates the same sort of buzz as that of Lukaku’s trade to Manchester United—or when Randy Moss was traded to the Patriots, if you’re into the other football. But it’s not just the creative director round robin—social media now gives playoff-level buzz to events like Paris Men’s Week, Pitti, and the CFDA awards. Anna Wintour has done everything in her power to make the Met Ball feel like the Super Bowl. It is a bit of a stretch to say that any individual brand can cultivate the same following as a given football team, but if Supreme offers any indication, that’s where we are heading.

The only thing missing from this near-perfect analogy? Rivalries. Fashion, in short, lacks them, which is a shame considering that they are a massive part of what makes sports fandom so enthralling. Growing up in New England, this writer was taught to yell “Yankees Suck” before learning to walk. Competitive energy within the industry is hard to find and, when discovered, is often strictly behind the scenes. Yves Saint Laurent and Karl Lagerfeld allegedly had it out a few times back in the ‘60s—and Raf Simons said some not-so-nice things about Abloh once—but who really cares.

As it stands today, there’s exactly one rivalry in fashion worth writing about, where two designers are fighting it out on the same turf, bringing completely different approaches to the same product. And they’re both named Tom—sort of.

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